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What's Weird?

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ELDER
Registered: Dec 2009
Posts: 570
Location: Bringing justice to all those bad vamps out there!
thats pretty weird... a tree! anyway i read something awhile back that was really weird, it doesnt top her doing a tree. i was reading this book where when this wizard is turned on and is in the time frame where he can procreats, he grows another penis beneath his other one but it goes in the womens anus and then grows barbs when inside so she cant get away. i have never read anything like this so it was pretty shocking to me.
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ELITE ELDER
Registered: Jun 2008
Posts: 2156
Location: Lost in a faerie forest
2 penis AND barbs! wow - talk about overkill!! Just in case she wasn't sure she was full enough.
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Registered: Jan 2010
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Lightheaded wrote
If I post the title won't that make this a spoiler thread? I was trying to avoid doing that so people could post their weird scenes and not spoil it for others. *clears throat* however, if you look at my signature line you'll have your answer, SMBD. It's a book I've had for 2 years now but haven't read until now.
VKD, actually the avi came first and was inspired by the concept of growing things in spring. Can you see the people at the bottom? It does tie in nicely with the tree scene tho doesn't it? Actually she got done by roots but my avi makes a better visual.


hey i saw a sneak peek of that book last night in the back of Lyon:Lords of Satyr.... It must be a sign. Its about the devil or something? It said she was rubbing against weeds and he fondled himself.
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Registered: Mar 2010
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I have the perfect slogan for that book, Lighthead.

Ready?

"Got Wood?"

Tee Hee! What? At least I amuse myself ;)

Tates - I'm gonna guess that the author of that book has never actually been penetrated by a penis because barbs + thrusting = Ow Ow Ow Ow OWWWWW!
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Registered: Feb 2010
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Location: Having some playtime in the centaur pen,then after that it's off to the merman tank ;)
Lightheaded wrote
There's a lot of odd scenes in pnr books. People blowing up into bits, wild and crazy sex scenes with multiple persons and items, strange deaths, people turning into things, etc. I thought I was fairly, um, worldly about such things. Until today. :roll:

I just popped a new sexual weirdness cherry when the girl in my book got fucked by a tree. I'm not kidding - A TREE! :shock: The roots came out of the ground and she had a good time. A couple guys got off watching her also. :oops:

So I thought I'd ask you all what's the weirdest thing you've read. Doesn't have to be sexual.
*Goes out to her backyard and stands by a tree* dammit nothings happening! j/k I love your avi... we all need a penis tree
ELDER
Registered: Dec 2009
Posts: 570
Location: Bringing justice to all those bad vamps out there!
the book was by beatrice small, the series was really good, but the book i was talking about was really out there.
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currently reading: Seduce Me in Dreams by J. Frank
just finished: Real Vamps Have More to Love by Gerry Bartlett
up next: Lover Unleashed by JR Ward
LOVE THE VAMPIRE HUNTRESS SERIES BY LA BANKS!!!

www.shelfari.com/TatesReaper

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Member
Registered: Aug 2009
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Lightheaded wrote
2 penis AND barbs! wow - talk about overkill!! Just in case she wasn't sure she was full enough.


*spews drink, Laughing*
ELITE ELDER
Registered: Jun 2008
Posts: 2156
Location: Lost in a faerie forest
SuckMyBlackDagger wrote
hey i saw a sneak peek of that book last night in the back of Lyon:Lords of Satyr.... It must be a sign. Its about the devil or something? It said she was rubbing against weeds and he fondled himself.

I'm not surprised you saw it. They are the same type of book. He's not a devil, he's a selkie. She does like the weeds rubbing her - hey, it's erotica, they enjoy EVERYTHING *shakes head* but I don't always get why :roll:

SVG, when you went out to your tree, did you put on your sheerest nighty for it? LOL Doesn't every home need a penis tree? If we planted them would they catch on? What would the neighbors think? hee hee. :P

Winchester, barbs like a cat would defo hurt but luckily in erotica they just rub gspots in a good way. Have you read the breed series by Lora Leigh? That explains the concept very well. :mrgreen:
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ELDER
Registered: Jul 2009
Posts: 262
Location: Doing bad things to good people
TeamVampire wrote
ILoveEdwardCullen wrote
root is a euphamism for penis....I'm just sayin'


*rolls eyes* uh huh...sure Cullen.


'Tis!
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Lightheaded wrote
SuckMyBlackDagger wrote
hey i saw a sneak peek of that book last night in the back of Lyon:Lords of Satyr.... It must be a sign. Its about the devil or something? It said she was rubbing against weeds and he fondled himself.

I'm not surprised you saw it. They are the same type of book. He's not a devil, he's a selkie. She does like the weeds rubbing her - hey, it's erotica, they enjoy EVERYTHING *shakes head* but I don't always get why :roll:

SVG, when you went out to your tree, did you put on your sheerest nighty for it? LOL Doesn't every home need a penis tree? If we planted them would they catch on? What would the neighbors think? hee hee. :P

Winchester, barbs like a cat would defo hurt but luckily in erotica they just rub gspots in a good way. Have you read the breed series by Lora Leigh? That explains the concept very well. :mrgreen:
I was naked ;), the perks of living in the country. I don't think I make any of my trees horny..... maybe their gay trees *ponders*
ELDER
Registered: Jul 2009
Posts: 262
Location: Doing bad things to good people
When in an art class I did a project called Phallic world where I took pictures of things that looked liked penises. It was fun and very me. =) Especially to show as a powerpoint to the class. :twisted:
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Lightheaded wrote
Winchester, barbs like a cat would defo hurt but luckily in erotica they just rub gspots in a good way. Have you read the breed series by Lora Leigh? That explains the concept very well. :mrgreen:


Didn't they debunk the G-spot? Dont tell me I've got to get my wet suit on and flashlight out to go hunting again!

Southern Vampire Girl wrote
I was naked ;), the perks of living in the country. I don't think I make any of my trees horny..... maybe their gay trees *ponders*

Tis possible. I have a gay dog so it does happen with other species. Unfortunately the dog Andy is in love with is straight :( Unrequited love sucks.
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CSWinchester wrote
Lightheaded wrote
Winchester, barbs like a cat would defo hurt but luckily in erotica they just rub gspots in a good way. Have you read the breed series by Lora Leigh? That explains the concept very well. :mrgreen:


Didn't they debunk the G-spot? Dont tell me I've got to get my wet suit on and flashlight out to go hunting again!

Southern Vampire Girl wrote
I was naked ;), the perks of living in the country. I don't think I make any of my trees horny..... maybe their gay trees *ponders*

Tis possible. I have a gay dog so it does happen with other species. Unfortunately the dog Andy is in love with is straight :( Unrequited love sucks.
Awww thats sad... poor Andy :(
ELDER
Registered: Jul 2009
Posts: 262
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I think the whole G spot debunking was a bunch of scientists that couldn't find it. I know that I have one. LOL
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ELITE ELDER Res. Ent. Dir.
Registered: Feb 2008
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A gay dog?
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ILEC, put em next to the ball gags and body latex.
Member
Registered: Nov 2009
Posts: 823
Location: Romania... homeland of vamps
Isn't this nice? Looks like nature screwed other species, also, not only humans.... LOL.

Anyway, CSW, sorry about Andy... is nasty not to have the object of your desire...

SVG, I'll be careful about exposing myself around trees.... you may never know what kind of desires are hidden behind the bark .... Might wanna warn your husband, too. Who knows, maybe you're right about their sexual pref.
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ELDER
Registered: Jul 2009
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NuckingFuts Nix AKA Mastema wrote
A gay dog?


About 10% of every animal population is gay Nix. Secretariat was too. Gave his owners hell. =)
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NuckingFuts Nix AKA Mastema wrote
A gay dog?

Seriously. He's 6 years old, never been neutered and the only dogs he has ever shown any interest in have all been other boys.

It does happen.
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On the next Maury, gay dogs and the owners who love them.....
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ILEC, put em next to the ball gags and body latex.
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*laughs* GOOD ONE NIX!
ELITE ELDER
Registered: Oct 2008
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NuckingFuts Nix AKA Mastema wrote
On the next Maury, gay dogs and the owners who love them.....


That's more Jerry Springer style,, Maury is all about ... you are NOT the father!
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XAVIA wrote
NuckingFuts Nix AKA Mastema wrote
On the next Maury, gay dogs and the owners who love them.....


That's more Jerry Springer style,, Maury is all about ... you are NOT the father!

Oh god, no! Poor old Andy is not exactly brave, appearing on Jerry would scar him for life! :(
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lady dracula wrote
Isn't this nice? Looks like nature screwed other species, also, not only humans.... LOL.

Anyway, CSW, sorry about Andy... is nasty not to have the object of your desire...

SVG, I'll be careful about exposing myself around trees.... you may never know what kind of desires are hidden behind the bark .... Might wanna warn your husband, too. Who knows, maybe you're right about their sexual pref.
Yeah my husband is a small guy so he would be no match for those big ol trees lol though the idea does make me horny
ELITE ELDER WIELDER OF WICKEDNESS
Registered: May 2008
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Southern Vampire Girl wrote
we all need a penis tree


I quite agree. Perhaps we can incorporate one into our RPG?? LH??
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Queen VKD, Mistress of All Who Dare Enter
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ILoveEdwardCullen wrote
Southern Vampire Girl wrote
we all need a penis tree


I quite agree. Perhaps we can incorporate one into our RPG?? LH??

Keep the trees out of my room!
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Vampire Romance Books Forum » Chit-Chat » What's Weird?